Upon hearing the news, Tang Jianxi fell silent for a moment.
Then she instructed, “Follow her closely, gather information on the people around her, and be careful not to expose yourselves. Try to establish contact with her as quickly as possible.”
The news had clearly dealt Tang Jianxi a blow. After hanging up, she sat limply beside Yun Chuji, like an orange scorched by high heat. Yun Chuji had no doubt that if not for the outer layer of pride that held her together, the painful liquid would have rushed out from her vacant eyes.
Yun Chuji didn’t understand her sorrow. In her view, being alive was good enough. Giving birth wasn’t some cruel punishment. Being deceived by a villain and losing one’s innocence was indeed lamentable, but she was no longer the Yun Chuji of the past. She knew that in such a situation, the loss of innocence was not the victim’s fault, but the perpetrator’s crime.
But it was still a hardship. She couldn’t be so magnanimous as to say this was a good outcome. Jianxi was very kind, and such words wouldn’t comfort her.
So she closed her mouth and chose to comfort Tang Jianxi with her actions.
Yun Chuji tentatively took Tang Jianxi’s hand. Mimicking how Tang Jianxi had once comforted her, she turned sideways and gently held her in her arms, her long fingers stroking her back as tenderly as one would soothe a baby.
Tang Jianxi was like a puppet, letting her do as she pleased. She didn’t cry out like Yun Chuji had. She didn’t cry. The only thing she did was rest her cheek in the crook of Yun Chuji’s shoulder, letting the other’s warmth slowly melt the maddening ice in her heart.
“I feel like we’re so cheap,” she murmured.
“To be so easily bought and sold, and then to really act like custom-made machines, doing whatever they want us to do.”
Yun Chuji still couldn’t quite grasp Tang Jianxi’s words. She was born in an era where human trafficking was not illegal. Most of the people around her were servants bought with money. And an act like Helen’s, buying a wife to bear children, was not considered outrageous in her time. It was even quite fashionable, as long as one negotiated properly with the girl’s parents and didn’t abduct her by force.
That was the proper procedure for seeking a wife.
Of course, if one didn’t care for propriety and just wanted a wife, buying one from a procuress was also an option, though it would invite ridicule. After all, these women had passed through so many hands, they could hardly be considered respectable young ladies.
If it was just for a concubine, that was barely acceptable.
As these thoughts ran through her mind, Yun Chuji was suddenly struck with horror. She realized that this was largely the same as what was written in that heretical book—a wife is her husband’s slave—just phrased more respectably. It was a twin brother to the propriety that had always separated a wife from a concubine.
Her face began to turn pale.
Her warm body started to grow cold.
She found it hard to imagine that she was of the same rank as the servants who waited on her.
Yun Chuji felt utterly mortified.
Mortified by her own past, baseless arrogance, and mortified that she had been so full of anticipation while preparing to sell herself.
Tang Jianxi naturally sensed the change in Yun Chuji. The gentle hand suddenly stiffened, and the heartbeat by her ear began to race for no reason. If she hadn’t also felt the other’s skin suddenly turn cold, Tang Jianxi might have thought Yun Chuji was aroused.
She lifted her head from Yun Chuji’s embrace, found she couldn’t see her expression clearly, and reached out, tilting the other’s chin up to make her look down.
What a face. She looked like she was about to cry.
So was Yun Chuji’s method of comforting people to transfer the sadness?
What a strange constitution!
Tang Jianxi used sarcasm to lighten the heaviness in her heart, adjusting herself into a state where she could speak gently. “What’s wrong?”
Yun Chuji’s chin was still held. She pressed against Tang Jianxi’s hand and slowly buried her face in Tang Jianxi’s embrace. They held each other, neck to neck, and Tang Jianxi heard her say in a muffled voice, “It’s nothing. I just realized how stupid and bad I used to be.”
Tang Jianxi could never understand what moral standard Yun Chuji held herself to. In order to understand her, she had once forced herself to read the Four Books and Five Classics, but she’d grown drowsy after just a couple of pages, only remembering the words “sage” and “gentleman.” In her eyes, Yun Chuji was already a rare good person. For someone like that to claim she was stupid and bad, Tang Jianxi could only guess she aspired to be a sage.
“If you’re stupid and bad, then there aren’t many smart and kind people left in this world.”
Yun Chuji pursed her lips, unable to resist rubbing her cheek against Tang Jianxi’s neck, causing Miss Tang’s breathing to halt for five seconds.
“Don’t humor me,” she said softly.
As expected, this child was just starved for praise.
Tang Jianxi smiled gently, sweet words tumbling out as if they cost nothing. “I’m not humoring you. Our Xiao Ji is truly smart and kind, very considerate of others, and very cute. In short, you’re full of good qualities.”
Yun Chuji’s face was flushed. Tang Jianxi’s skill at comforting people was simply unfathomable. Yun Chuji had thought an embrace was healing enough, but she hadn’t expected that an embrace combined with gentle, soft words was the ultimate weapon.
She felt like Tang Jianxi was coaxing her into becoming a child again. But Tang Jianxi had just been grieving a moment ago, yet now she could muster the spirit to comfort her. Yun Chuji felt both ashamed and full of admiration, a faint feeling in her heart already elevating Tang Jianxi to the status of her lifelong idol.
“I was just thinking about my past life and suddenly realized I was living in a daze. I looked like the daughter of an official, but in reality, my fate was that of a servant. Yet I foolishly believed I was the master.”
“But it’s much better now. I believe I’ll change for the better.”
“What about you, Jianxi? You must be sad about more than just Miss Moran.”
It had to be said that humans were creatures who constantly yielded to sensory experiences. Hearing Yun Chuji’s question, the only coherent thought left in Tang Jianxi’s mind was this one. The rest were either absurd or unrealistic.
And the reason for all this was simply because their posture was too intimate. Yun Chuji’s words had been too long, causing her warm breath to continuously touch her gland.
It was simply torture. Tang Jianxi almost fantasized with excitement: If only we could be closer.
The memories of those two nights broke free from the mud at the bottom of the lake. Tang Jianxi had previously thought them long buried, surely rotted beyond recognition. But now, in the moonlight of love, those memories shimmered with the brilliance of a mermaid from a fairy tale.
Tang Jianxi admitted, at least now, at least at this moment, she missed that brilliance.
But how could this be?
Just a short while ago, she had been lamenting the fate of a pitiful person, resentful of the reality of omegas being ruthlessly exploited.
Tang Jianxi had always been aware that her omega body had instincts. This instinct endlessly craved an alpha’s comfort, which was why she had always loathed it. But she had never imagined that her mind also had instincts, filling her soul with baseless fantasies.
But, she’s so close to me. It doesn’t have to be a fantasy, does it?
Tang Jianxi moved closer, her lips gently pressing against Yun Chuji’s fragrant neck.
Just then, Yun Chuji’s confused voice came from beside her ear. “Jianxi? Why did you stop talking?”
Tang Jianxi snapped back to her senses. She pulled away, feigning naturalness, pretending it had just been an insignificant accident.
“Hm? What were you just saying?”
Yun Chuji repeated her words.
Tang Jianxi didn’t get up. Even though she knew she would be tempted, she didn’t want to get up. This, too, was likely part of her instinct.
She tried hard to recall her previous emotions, finally managing to break free from that terrifying fantasy. “Me? It’s true, it’s not just about Helen. What saddens me more is that things like this happen too often—omegas forced into marriage, omegas legally raped for going into heat on the street, omegas locked in houses to give birth to one child after another. Sometimes I can’t help but wonder if I only care so much about the tragedies of omegas because I am one. But in reality, alphas have their own insurmountable tragedies too. No one is living happily enough.”
At this, Tang Jianxi gave a light laugh, sending a puff of warm air against the skin below Yun Chuji’s ear, successfully coloring it. But the Tang Jianxi who had been captivated by the instincts of her body and soul was gone. She didn’t notice. Her beautiful eyes were vacant and distant. “Later, I realized how ridiculously wrong I was. The hardships alphas endure, omegas endure as well. But omegas also bear the hardships alphas inflict upon them. It was from that point on that I could no longer control my aversion to alphas.”
“Of course,” Tang Jianxi rubbed against Yun Chuji’s shoulder and said softly, “you’re different from them. You’re completely clean.”
No sin, and no desire to sin.
This was probably the first time—it was definitely the first time—that Tang Jianxi had sincerely revealed her thoughts to Yun Chuji. Her soul opened up just like her embrace, no longer in vague, fragmented sentences, nor with any mischievous teasing. She explained the secret of her character, which made Yun Chuji feel as if she had been drenched in a spring rain, fresh and warm. A larger, burgeoning world opened its doors to her. She had once hesitated outside that door, suspecting it was a shortcut to hell.
But now, Yun Chuji quietly touched the ends of Tang Jianxi’s hair.
A path led by a fairy, she thought, must lead to a fairyland.
She released Tang Jianxi, turning to face her directly. “I only understood half of what you said, because I still don’t know much about this world. But I feel that even the half I didn’t understand is right.”
“Jianxi, you’re truly the best person I’ve ever met.”
Tang Jianxi’s lips curved into a smile. She tilted her head slightly, studying Yun Chuji’s expression. “Are you genuinely praising me, or are you mimicking me from just now to comfort me?”
But this time, the usually overly earnest Yun Chuji launched a counterattack. “Then was Jianxi genuinely praising me just now, or comforting me?”
Tang Jianxi let out a “wow,” leaning back dramatically. “The little antique has learned to be naughty!”
“I’m learning from Jianxi, so it doesn’t count as being naughty.”
Tang Jianxi paused for a moment, then raised a hand to tidy her messy hair. She got up from the sofa, stood straight, and said with a grin, “I was genuinely praising you, and genuinely comforting you.”
The “tricky” question was thus easily resolved. Yun Chuji’s mouth opened slightly, then snapped shut as she echoed, “Me too!”
Tang Jianxi burst out laughing, then waved her hand. “I’m going to the study to sort out Helen’s matter. If you get hungry, just tell the housekeeping robot to make you something.”
There was too much to do; she couldn’t stay in the living room any longer. Based on the experience of the past few hours, she probably wouldn’t get much done if she stayed.
Yun Chuji nodded, then realized something else. She called out to Tang Jianxi, who was already walking towards the study, “What if you get hungry, Jianxi?”
Her voice still held a laugh. “If I get hungry, I’ll call you.”
Yun Chuji was stunned again.
After the door closed, Yun Chuji fidgeted for a while before furtively touching her own neck.
If she remembered correctly, that was the spot Jianxi had just kissed.
Perhaps it couldn’t be called a kiss. It was just an accidental touch. And between them, far more intimate, far deeper touches had happened many times before.
Why now, for something so simple, was it so unforgettable?
Yun Chuji had always known that under extreme stress, she could often produce excellent acting skills. That was how she had deceived the bandit leader—it was also the source of her confidence to go undercover in Glory.
At this moment, a delayed blush bloomed on Yun Chuji’s ears and neck. The person who caused it was at her desk, working, and missed the sight.
And the owner of this blush had a look of bewilderment in her eyes. This bewilderment had left a shadow in her heart before, one she had taken seriously. Only today did she truly see its full form.
Why, why was she so nervous because of Miss Tang’s touch?
She wasn’t trying to take her innocence.
She had already taken her innocence.
Even if she wanted to take it again, she wouldn’t resist to the death like she had with the bandit leader. It was highly likely she would even be half-willing.
If it wasn’t about innocence, then what was it?
Besides innocence, what else was there?
—Sixteen-year-old Yun Chuji finally welcomed her belated adolescent confusion.
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