Take them off? Sure, Xu Miao thought, did Xie Ge really think he wouldn’t dare?
Well… maybe just a little.
But only a little.
Xie Ge was betting that Xu Miao would be just as embarrassed as he was — after all, going shirtless and going pantless were two completely different things. The only reason Xu Miao had agreed so readily, Xie Ge thought, must’ve been because he assumed Xie Ge would refuse first out of embarrassment, making the whole condition void before it even began.
Otherwise, why would Xu Miao bring up that kind of condition? Wasn’t it just to ensure that when Xie Ge refused, Xu Miao could gracefully refuse as well?
The more he thought about it, the more confident Xie Ge became. With full assurance, he said, “You’re the one who made the condition, so you go first. Once you’re done, I’ll do it.”
Xu Miao looked at him suspiciously. “Can you repeat that? I didn’t quite catch it.”
See? Pretending not to understand already!
Sure he was right, Xie Ge enunciated each word clearly, repeating his earlier statement — completely unaware that, in the meantime, Xu Miao had already unlocked his phone.
Once he finished speaking, Xu Miao nodded. “Okay.”
Then he lifted the blanket, stood at the edge of the bed, gripped the waistband of his pants, and prepared to pull them down.
Before doing so, he looked up at Xie Ge.
To say Xie Ge was afraid wasn’t entirely accurate. His expression was more shock — the kind of surprise you get when something you never expected suddenly happens — mixed with a faint, almost unnoticeable trace of excitement.
But Xu Miao wasn’t “others.”
He noticed.
Continuing his movements, when the waistband of his underwear came into view, he paused and looked again at Xie Ge. Xie Ge’s Adam’s apple moved slightly; his eyes were fixed on him, utterly focused, curiosity burning.
“You really want to see that badly?” Xu Miao asked, pretending not to understand, his expression conflicted as if he couldn’t stop midway. “I have what you have. Why do you want to see me take off my pants? Don’t you think that’s strange?”
See, Xie Ge thought triumphantly — he *knew* Xu Miao wouldn’t go through with it!
He had a plan. He said, “You’re the one who brought it up — you can’t go back on your word.”
He figured that when Xu Miao tried to talk him into dropping it, he could use that chance to negotiate, suggest something easier instead, and save himself from actually having to take anything off.
But the plan went off track right at the crucial moment — because Xu Miao didn’t try to talk his way out of it. Without saying a word, he just took his pants off, letting them fall to the floor, standing boldly before Xie Ge with his long legs bare.
What lay beneath wasn’t much different from what Xie Ge had imagined. The pink marks didn’t stop at his waist; they covered his inner thighs — a disaster zone of overlapping bite marks and kiss traces, almost indecent to look at.
Xu Miao caught Xie Ge’s burning gaze and said, with his same old excuse, not even bothering to sound convincing, “Mosquito bites.”
Xie Ge gave a short laugh. “In the middle of winter? You might as well say a dog bit you.”
Then he muttered mockingly, “What a rude dog… look how badly it bit you, didn’t even know how to control its strength.”
Self-awareness, at least.
Xu Miao nodded seriously. “Exactly, what terrible manners.”
“But can you stop changing the subject? I’m done — it’s your turn now.”
He took a few steps toward Xie Ge, casually reached for the drawstring on Xie Ge’s pajama pants, and gave it a light tug. The knot came undone immediately.
His hands moved fast and boldly, while his voice sounded gently polite: “Do you want me to help you?”
That wasn’t right.
That definitely wasn’t right.
Startled, Xie Ge stepped back several paces, clutching his waistband protectively like someone afraid of being harassed. He said in an appeasing tone, “Can we pretend I was joking? I’m actually a really humorous guy, see — I just like making jokes. You’re not supposed to take what I say seriously.”
As he finished speaking, he heard a small sound from Xu Miao — a short “heh,” or maybe a low “mm.”
Then Xu Miao took another step forward. “We made an agreement. Are you trying to go back on it?”
Alright, mystery solved — it was definitely “heh,” not “mm.”
Xie Ge instinctively backed away. Who could have guessed that Xu Miao didn’t play by any normal rules, ruining all his careful planning halfway through?
Out of options, Xie Ge resorted to acting clueless. “Going back on it? What? I never said that. I don’t remember agreeing to anything. If I did, I’d probably remember it — but I don’t, so clearly I didn’t.”
Indeed, Xie Ge could always be counted on to uphold his “fine traditional virtue” of shameless denial.
Xu Miao knew this, so he came prepared.
He smiled a little too knowingly, picked up his phone, turned the volume all the way up, and pressed play.
The recording played.
When it finished, Xu Miao dragged the progress bar back and hit play again.
And again.
And again.
After ten full repetitions of hearing his own clearly enunciated voice saying, “Once you take yours off, I’ll take mine off,” Xie Ge finally lost it. He stopped clutching his waistband, and — not even worried about being touched anymore — stormed over in a few strides, reaching out like a robber to snatch Xu Miao’s phone.
Unfortunately, the thief’s skills were lacking, and his opponent was quicker. Just as Xie Ge’s hand was about to grab it, Xu Miao swiftly hid the phone behind his back.
All that filled Xie Ge’s mind was the desperate need to get that damned phone and delete that damned recording.
To grab the phone hidden behind Xu Miao, he used both hands — one hand seized Xu Miao’s wrist, pinning it, while the other reached for the phone.
He didn’t even notice how it made them look, his arms wrapped around Xu Miao in a lopsided embrace, fully focused on prying open his fingers and destroying the evidence.
But protecting the recording wasn’t Xu Miao’s goal. At just the right moment, Xu Miao let go. As Xie Ge triumphantly got the phone, Xu Miao slipped an arm around Xie Ge’s waist.
It was a familiar motion — one performed so often that the body didn’t even register the intimacy of it right away. It wasn’t until Xu Miao straightened up that Xie Ge realized they’d just shared a fleeting, close embrace.
Xu Miao shook his hand out. “Did you really need to use that much strength? What, am I your enemy? You almost broke my fingers.”
Since Xie Ge had deliberately been gentle at the start, failing to take the phone quickly, now he found himself unable to argue caught beyond explanation, Still, priorities were priorities — after deleting the recording, he finally said weakly, “I didn’t use much strength, just held your wrist tighter so you wouldn’t jerk away.”
“Oh?” Xu Miao said, taking the chance to play it up. “Well, now my wrist really hurts.”
“Does it hurt badly?”
“Terribly. Super badly. Incredibly bad,” Xu Miao answered without hesitation.
“Sorry,” said Xie Ge sincerely.
“Don’t worry about it,” Xu Miao replied generously, then continued, “So… when do you plan to take them off?”
Take off what? How had the topic gone back to that again?
Having already destroyed the evidence, Xie Ge certainly wasn’t going to admit to anything. “I don’t understand what you’re talking about.”
Xu Miao’s eyes curved in amusement. “Playing dumb won’t work, baby. My phone automatically backs up. Deleting that one doesn’t matter — it’s synced to the cloud. Want me to play it again for you?”
Baby—?!
Who was he calling baby?!
Xie Ge’s voice shot up. “Despicable!”
Absolutely shameless. He didn’t even use his name before — just you, you, you — but now, the moment he wanted him to take off his pants, he suddenly called him “baby”? Too despicable!
Xu Miao chuckled. “Then you’re shameless.”
“Back to you again?” Xie Ge complained.
Feigning puzzlement, Xu Miao said, “What?”
Xie Ge, flustered, couldn’t say it directly; he muttered, “You know perfectly well.”
“I wouldn’t be asking if I knew,” Xu Miao said innocently.
Of course, he knew perfectly well — and he was doing it deliberately. Whether it was the Xie Ge who’d been dating him for a year, or the one who had already married him, both were equally weak against affectionate nicknames like that. They always gave in eventually.
As expected, Xie Ge said under his breath, “If you call me that again… I’ll take them off.”
He wasn’t feverish anymore — he was perfectly clear-headed. That made it even more embarrassing, especially since he’d just added new conditions: “But you can’t take photos or record anything.”
Xu Miao nodded. “Of course not. Didn’t you just take my phone? Even if I wanted to, I don’t have anything to record with.”
That made Xie Ge feel a bit better — but not for long.
He noticed something far more dangerous than a camera: Xu Miao’s eyes.
They stared straight at him — unwavering, unblinking — making Xie Ge’s scalp prickle.
Cornered, too nervous to follow through, he tied his waistband again, then slowly loosened it — pretending progress, pretending compliance.
Still too hard.
Why was it so hard?
Why could Xu Miao do it so easily?
“Can’t I just change somewhere else?” Xie Ge said, then quickly lowered the request. “Or maybe you could turn around for a bit? I’ll be quick, I won’t make you wait.”
He glanced at the pajama pants Xu Miao had left on the ground, already planning the fastest way to pull his own off and put those on in one motion.
He had the whole operation mentally timed out. All he needed was Xu Miao’s approval.
But Xu Miao refused. “I told you to undress because I want to see. If I turn around, what’s the point?” He smiled. “I’ve seen your legs — nothing special. What I want to see is the process.”
That sounded downright indecent — at least in Xie Ge’s ears.
“You just wanted your pajama pants back at first!” he protested.
Xu Miao grinned wider. “Like you said — *at first.* But I’ve already been seen by you from head to toe. Don’t you think it’s only fair you let me see too? Otherwise, I’m at a disadvantage.”
Xie Ge had no comeback. He realized he could never win against Xu Miao in words. Better to just yield and end it.
After all, he told himself, real gentlemen knew when to pick up and when to let go.
Meeting Xu Miao’s gaze, Xie Ge took off the pajama pants and handed them back. Xu Miao accepted, bent down, and put them on immediately.
They were slightly too long on him — just enough to notice. “Are you sure these are yours?” Xie Ge asked reasonably.
“Of course,” Xu Miao said, drawing out his *hmm* smugly. “I bought them — so they’re mine.”
That wasn’t his! He tricked him again!
Rebellion surged again in Xie Ge’s chest. “Fine! This time, I’ll just give back *everything* you bought — and then you can stop randomly asking me to strip!”
“Really?” Xu Miao asked, smiling.
“Really,” Xie Ge said firmly.
At worst, he thought, he’d just have to take off his shirt. His pants were already gone — what else could happen?
Xu Miao laughed outright. “That underwear you’re wearing? I bought that too. Are you planning to take that off now? Or do you need a few minutes to prepare?”
The thought alone made him grin wider, his eyes nearly narrowing from amusement. “What a coincidence — you’re wearing the new ones I just bought. The receipt’s still around somewhere in a drawer. Should I go find it for you?”
As every gambler’s tale goes — complete defeat. Xie Ge didn’t dare bet again. What if Xu Miao really did find the receipt? What would he do — take them off, or not?
Turning on his heel, Xie Ge headed for the door, pretending nothing had happened. “What time is it? Lunchtime already? How come Auntie hasn’t come? Didn’t you say she only took one day off? Should we order delivery? I’m starving — wonder if that one place we used to get food from still tastes the same.”
Xu Miao followed leisurely. “Around noon, maybe. Auntie’s still busy with family stuff. We can order delivery, sure — though normally *you’re* the one who cooks for me.”
In truth, there was no “Auntie.” Xie Ge had dismissed the housemaid long ago, disliking anyone intruding on their time together. After learning to cook, he insisted on doing everything himself — even hand-washing Xu Miao’s clothes.
Xie Ge walked quickly, clearly in a hurry — though it was anyone’s guess what exactly he was hurrying from.
Both of them left the bedroom, one after the other. He wandered around, Xu Miao trailing behind him.
After a few minutes circling the living room, Xu Miao asked, “Where are you going?”
“I’m just taking a walk,” Xie Ge muttered.
They did a few more aimless laps until the door suddenly beeped — the sound of a passcode being entered.
The mechanical voice chimed, “Welcome home,” as the door opened halfway, and a voice called out: “Ge, are you up? Mom told me to bring you some brain food— What the fu—!”
Both men — wearing just a set of pajamas between the two of them — looked toward the door. Xie Min dropped everything in his hands; walnuts and blueberries rolled all over the floor.
Covering his eyes with a shriek, he peeked through his fingers a few seconds later and yelled again, “Ge! I thought you were still, you know, pure and chaste — that’s the only reason I came over! If I’d known you were home with Xu Miao and already completely gone, I’d have called first—”
He screamed, “No way! I’m never coming here again! At least put some clothes on, Ge! This is not an appropriate sight!”
