AFMUH Ch 65

Chapter 65: Heartache

 

After Qiuniang finished speaking, Aunt Li quickly tugged at her sleeve and gave her a meaningful look. Qiuniang immediately covered her mouth, realizing she had spoken impulsively.

 

“Just vomited once. What if it’s not true? Brother and Sister-in-law would be disappointed.”

 

Despite this, a faint smile lingered on Aunt Li’s lips as she said to Qiu Henian, “Eldest Brother, quickly help Qingyan back to the room to lie down for a while. It’s drafty at the front of the outer room, don’t let him catch a chill.”

 

Qiu Henian agreed and bent down to lift Qingyan horizontally. Qingyan had just heard Qiuniang’s words and was a bit flustered. But he was aware of the many people around and Nian Sheng was there too, so he refused to be carried.

 

The young couple tangled for a while and finally returned to their room. Once the door closed, Qingyan was lifted and gently placed on the bed.

 

Qiu Henian fetched warm water for Qingyan to drink and asked softly, “Still feeling uncomfortable?”

 

Qingyan was still in a daze. 

 

Upon hearing this, he shook his head and said, “I feel much better after vomiting.”

 

Outside, firecrackers resounded, and flashes occasionally lit up the windows, fireworks from nearby households illuminating the night sky.

 

Qiu Henian glanced in the direction of the window and said, “Later, let Aunt Li and Qiuniang take care of you. I’ll go to the neighboring village and bring the old doctor over to check on you.”

 

Saying so, he was about to get up. Qingyan hurriedly reached out and pulled his robe, saying, “No need, maybe it’s just discomfort from eating too much variety. The doctor is also celebrating New Year’s Eve at home, let’s not trouble him. If it’s still not better the day after tomorrow, we can still go.”

 

Qiu Henian was still uneasy. 

 

He watched Qingyan for a while by the bed, touched his forehead, and seeing that his complexion was only slightly pale without other discomforts, he said, “Don’t hesitate to tell me if anything feels uncomfortable.”

 

Qingyan nodded in agreement.

 

It was almost time for Aunt Li and them to leave. Qiu Henian asked Qingyan to rest lying down and escorted the guests outside himself.

 

Qingyan lay alone facing inward on the bed. He could faintly hear the conversation outside the outer room. Aunt Li was telling Qiu Henian not to sleep too deeply at night and to be mindful of his movements.

 

She also mentioned preparing some hot porridge for him later, but if he couldn’t eat or kept vomiting, he shouldn’t force himself. He could eat when he felt hungry.

 

Qiuniang added, “Make it sour. Sour things are easier to eat. That’s how I…”

 

She didn’t finish her sentence, realizing she had spoken impulsively again.

 

A small figure lightly jumped onto the bed from the ground, and the purring sound approached Qingyan’s face. He opened his eyes and saw Ah Miao noticing him and happily rubbing its furry head against his face.

 

Qingyan gently stroked its little head with his hand.

 

After a while, the door clicked again. Qiu Henian came in from outside. Qingyan quickly closed his eyes, pretending to be asleep.

 

Qingyan heard the tray being placed on the table, and his nose caught the aroma of food.

 

Footsteps paused by the bed, and he could feel someone sitting by the bed.

 

Later, the little calico cat that had been rubbing against his face was picked up, the blanket was pulled up, and it was gently placed over him.

 

Throughout this process, Qingyan tried hard to keep his breathing steady.

 

He heard Qiu Henian taking the tray out again, and there was a slight sound from outside. Later, the other person came in, washed up briefly, and then got into bed.

 

The oil lamp went out. Qingyan felt Qiu Henian lying behind him and knew he was going to sleep.

 

He relaxed slightly, and a large hand reached over. Qingyan thought he was going to be embraced around the waist, as he and Qiu Henian were used to sleeping like that.

 

However, instead of resting heavily on his side, that hand carefully circled around his waist, the palm gently touching his lower abdomen through thin clothing, softly stroking there.

 

A warm kiss landed on Qingyan’s ear, and only after that did the hand carefully withdraw.

 

Qiu Henian lay down behind Qingyan and finally fell asleep.

 

It wasn’t until this moment that Qingyan’s eyelashes trembled, and his breathing faltered for a beat.

 

He knew what Qiu Henian was touching.

 

Since he vomited, Qiu Henian had shown only worry on his face, without displaying any expectations. Aunt Li and Qiuniang’s behavior had been quite obvious, and Qiu Henian couldn’t possibly not understand what that might mean.

 

Moreover, Qingyan happened to be in his fertile period before the New Year. Only the two of them knew that during that time, the bedding at home was often wet.

 

Calculating the dates, it was very likely from the time before they went up the mountain.

 

Qiu Henian must have understood it all clearly. Although he hadn’t said anything just now and his expression hadn’t shown anything special, when he thought Qingyan was already asleep, he still revealed his inner expectations.

 

In the darkness, Qingyan bit his lip, feeling complicated.

 

He had said to let nature take its course, and he had prepared himself for pregnancy. Yet when this day really seemed to be approaching, he felt anxious again.

 

At the moment, he couldn’t accept being a pregnant husband himself and was afraid of the childbirth process he knew nothing about, even more afraid that he wouldn’t be a qualified parent.

 

In the latter half of the night, Qingyan got up again to vomit, this time with an empty stomach, bringing up only bile.

 

Qiu Henian heated up porridge for him, but he couldn’t eat a single bite.

 

After vomiting this time, Qingyan finally fell into a deep sleep. When he woke up the next day, he found Qiu Henian’s eyes bloodshot. He had stayed awake all night, keeping watch over him and hadn’t dared to sleep.

 

Qingyan reached up to touch Qiu Henian’s eyelids. He lowered his head slightly, eyes downcast, allowing Qingyan to stroke him. His face looked a bit tired, obviously not comfortable with being touched there, but still accepting it tolerantly.

 

Qingyan looked at him, feeling like another piece of his heart was falling. No matter what he was worried about, as long as Qiu Henian was there, he wasn’t facing it alone.

 

Qingyan calmed down. It was only then that he felt hungry. 

 

He let go of his hand and said, “I want to drink porridge, and I want to eat the pickles you made.”

 

Hearing him say he had an appetite, Qiu Henian’s worried expression finally eased a bit. 

 

He smiled and said, “Then wait a moment, I’ll go soak the pickles to remove the sourness and bring back some lean meat from the snow outside…”

 

Qingyan shook his head. 

 

“No need to soak, no need to fry. I just want to eat them directly.”

 

Qiu Henian looked at him in surprise. Qingyan lowered his head and said softly, “I want to eat something sour.”

 

Qiu Henian’s hand on his knee suddenly clenched tightly.

 

…

 

He said he had an appetite, but in reality, he only drank half a bowl of porridge and ate a few pieces of pickled vegetables.

 

This time was better; he didn’t vomit after eating.

 

But he couldn’t just eat pickled vegetables every meal. Qiu Henian went to ask Aunt Li. Aunt Li’s eyes lit up and she couldn’t help but happily gave him the dried sour plums her daughter had given her. Still worried, she specially followed him here, instructing him about this and that, afraid that Qingyan might trip or bump into something.

 

No one explicitly said anything, but the joy in their eyes was hard to conceal.

 

Qingyan lay in bed, listening to the voices outside, and unconsciously, a smile appeared on his face.

 

A child, a child who looked similar to him and Qiu Henian. 

 

Qingyan couldn’t imagine what exactly this child would look like, but he hoped he would have eyes as calm and beautiful as Qiu Henian’s, resembling the tranquility of a lake.

 

…

 

Over the next two days, Qingyan vomited more severely, unable to keep down anything, barely eating.

 

He was not originally fat, but after these few days, his face was so thin, only a narrow strip remained.

 

Qiu Henian couldn’t bear it anymore, asking Aunt Li to come and help look after him. He pushed the cart to the neighboring village to fetch the old doctor.

 

It took some effort for him to go. The old doctor had gone to town to visit relatives. Qiu Henian found the doctor at their relative’s house, forcefully bringing him out.

 

Luckily, this old man was kind-hearted and carried his medicine box with him. Without arguing with Qiu Henian, he wiped his mouth and followed him out before finishing his drink.

 

When they arrived home, Aunt Li had been anxiously waiting at the gate for some time. As soon as she saw Qiu Henian, she hurriedly said, “Since you left, he hasn’t been able to eat anything, and he vomited three times again. This last time, I carefully observed, why does it seem like there are traces of blood?”

 

At these words, Qiu Henian’s body stiffened. Then he hurriedly ran towards the house.

 

The old doctor called after him from behind, “Hey, why are you running so fast? If I don’t come, can you treat yourself?”

 

Aunt Li quickly called out to the old doctor, “Master, he’s very anxious. Let me help you inside.”

 

Before entering the house, Aunt Li anxiously whispered to the old doctor, “This kid is having severe morning sickness. Can it be so serious?”

 

The old doctor pondered for a moment before saying, “It could be more serious than this.”

 

Upon hearing this, Aunt Li felt slightly relieved and supported the old doctor into the house.

 

Inside the room, the bed curtains were drawn aside, hanging on both sides.

 

Qingyan was wearing a white undershirt, covered with a gray robe, making his pale face even more noticeable.

 

His upper body leaned against Qiu Henian, eyes half-closed, his thin body slightly moving up and down. One hand weakly held by the man’s large hand, placed at the edge of the bed.

 

Qiu Henian was looking at Qingyan with lowered eyes. It was only when Aunt Li brought the old doctor in that he heard movement and looked up.

 

As Aunt Li met his gaze, her heart skipped a beat when she saw his expression. She couldn’t help but think that if something happened to Qingyan, he might do something crazy and terrible.

 

Aunt Li quickly brought a chair for the old doctor to the bedside. The old man sat down, his fingers pressing on Qingyan’s wrist at the edge of the bed. After a while, he checked Qingyan’s eyes and examined his tongue coating.

 

He also asked about Qingyan’s recent diet and physical condition.

 

After finishing, the old doctor sighed and said, “Pulse thin as silk, not enough fullness, nor is it a slippery pulse.”

 

Aunt Li didn’t quite understand and asked, “What does that mean?”

 

The old doctor shook his head and said, “This young man, he’s not pregnant, but suffering from a deficiency syndrome.”

 

When these words came out, Aunt Li looked at Qiu Henian in confusion, and Qiu Henian was also momentarily stunned. But he quickly relaxed, and the red blood vessels in his eyes gradually faded away.

 

Qingyan, though weak, heard these words but didn’t show any reaction, just lightly moved the fingers of the hand placed at the edge of the bed.

 

Qingyan had a weak stomach since childhood, weaker than others due to often not eating on time.

 

This Lunar New Year, the family bought frozen pears and persimmons. Qingyan was fond of the refreshing and delicious frozen pears, eating too much combined with the various foods during the Spring Festival, causing his weak stomach to be unable to bear it, hence vomiting for the past two or three days.

 

Wanting to eat something sour was just to stimulate his appetite, which could alleviate some discomfort.

 

The old doctor prescribed medication and performed acupuncture, quickly stopping the vomiting.

 

Qiu Henian escorted the old doctor back.

 

Aunt Li stayed with Qingyan in the room, holding his hand, comforting him, “As long as you’re okay, you’re still young. There’s no rush for children; they will come sooner or later.”

 

Qingyan leaned against the pillow, weakly smiled at her, saying, “Aunt, I’m fine.”

 

By the time Qiu Henian returned from town, it was already dark.

 

Aunt Li cooked a pot of noodles for them and then went home.

 

Qiu Henian moved the table to the bedside, and they sat on the edge of the bed eating soup noodles. As they ate, Qingyan’s bowl was placed on the table.

 

Qiu Henian turned to look and saw tears streaming down Qingyan’s pale face as he silently cried.

 

Qiu Henian quickly put down his bowl, got up, took a cloth and came over, sitting beside him, embracing his shoulders, wiping away his tears, softly asking, “What’s wrong? Are you still feeling uncomfortable somewhere?”

 

Qingyan shook his head. 

 

He reached out and hugged Qiu Henian’s neck, burying his face in his neck, sobbing, “I made you happy for nothing…”

 

Upon hearing this, Qiu Henian was initially stunned, then smiled helplessly, “It’s not like that…”

 

But Qingyan grabbed his hand and tried to tuck it into his robe, saying, “Let’s do it now; we’ll have a child soon.”

 

“Qingyan,” Qiu Henian tried to pull his hand back, but Qingyan refused to let go. 

 

They struggled for a while until Qiu Henian held him tightly, not letting him move, saying, “Qingyan, listen to me. Although I’ve said before that I hope for a child, I’m not fixated on it. Today, especially feeling something isn’t quite right, that’s why I insisted on inviting the doctor over. Now I’m just glad it’s not some serious illness. Otherwise, I…”

 

He didn’t finish his sentence, just swallowed, closed his eyes.

 

Looking up at him, Qingyan continued to cry, tears still flowing. 

 

He cried even harder, “But… but I thought I was really pregnant. Before, I didn’t want it, but now, I’m so sad.”

 

“Is it because I always despised it, so it didn’t come?” 

 

Qingyan cried, “Henian, I want a child.”

 

Qiu Henian let him sit on his thigh, comforting him while repeatedly stroking his back.

 

Holding Qingyan tightly, his heart ached; for his pure and persistent Qingyan!

 

Spoiler for the Next Chapter:

Just when Qingyan couldn’t resist asking him, the old physician stood up abruptly, muttering, “Hysteria, scars on the face, often unable to control during intercourse…”