“At that time, this minister had just turned six.”
“Yes, Zhen is two months older than you.” Li Xuanming looked out towards the tall palace walls in the distance, unchanging, unlike how they had, in an instant, grown from children into adults, each harboring their own thoughts. “It was hard on you, leaving your mother at such a young age to enter the palace and accompany Zhen. Zhen did not understand your hardship then and thought it unmanly for a boy to hide and cry in secret.”
“But Your Majesty later treated this subject very well, so this minister did not miss home as much.” Ming Zhang also recalled the past, a faint smile appearing through his hazy gaze. “When I returned home to visit my parents, I instead found myself longing to go back to the palace.”
“You always kept your troubles to yourself back then.” Li Xuanming raised his hand, gesturing for Ming Zhang to rise. “Zhen does not consider myself a particularly understanding person, but you are different from others. Don’t hide away alone in sorrow like you did as a child.”
“What would this minister have to be sorrowful about?” Ming Zhang lowered his head with a smile. Bringing up the past lightened the atmosphere considerably. “Thinking back to those of us from noble families who served as study companions, this minister is already the most fortunate one.”
Those who entered the palace as companions to the royal princes were, plainly speaking, a gamble by their families. Among them, several died young, and of course there were also those who perished alongside their masters during the struggle for succession.
Back when the princes fought for the position of crown prince, more than half were killed or injured. Ming Zhang had once felt fortunate that his own prince stayed away from the turmoil and did not compete. In the end, it turned out to be a good thing. It was also from that time that he began to imagine spending his life with his prince, fully releasing the feelings hidden in his heart.
Until the Crown Prince of the Eastern Palace died suddenly in an accident, and looking across the entire dynasty, the only one left able to inherit the throne was Li Xuanming. Ming Zhang had thought Li Xuanming would be shocked and at a loss, and he himself was so anxious that he could not sleep at night.
But he was wrong. From the moment the Crown Prince passed away, Li Xuanming seemed as if he had long anticipated it, and under the manipulation of Grand Chancellor Cui Yan, he calmly succeeded to the position of Crown Prince. From that moment on, Ming Zhang felt as though he were meeting this person he had accompanied for so many years for the first time. It felt so unfamiliar that it unsettled him.
In the future, he would stand above tens of thousands, marry a woman as empress, and perhaps have a harem of three thousand. Yet Ming Zhang believed that whether in depth of feeling or in the ability to assist in governance, he would certainly be the most special one, beyond compare.
“Zhen knows your original aspiration was not to enter officialdom, so when Zhen ascended the throne, Zhen told you that if you were unwilling, Zhen would never force you.”
“How could that be?” Ming Zhang laughed. “This minister remembers before entering the palace, my father told me that from then on, the Sixth Prince would be the one I must serve for life. At first, this minister was only fulfilling my father’s instruction, but later, when I came to realize it, I found it was already ingrained in my bones. Aside from following Your Majesty, I don’t know what else I could do.”
“Zhen understands.” Li Xuanming patted Ming Zhang’s shoulder, slightly gentler than before, yet with less feeling. “Zhen also owes you a great deal.”
Although it was not stated outright, Ming Zhang understood instantly. His whole body trembled slightly, and a wave of sorrow surged from his heart. In that instant, he bit down hard, forcing that bitterness to stop in his throat.
“No… this minister should do as much.”
“Li Xuanjing cannot escape while he is in the capital. You can withdraw at any time.” Li Xuanming turned and walked towards the window, deliberately leaving his back to him so that Ming Zhang’s moment of loss would not feel so exposed. “Zhen fears that in the end he might resort to desperate measures and harm you instead.”
The Emperor clearly knew that with King Wei having just rebelled and King Qin still watching from afar, it was not yet the time for him to withdraw. Was he truly concerned, or had he discovered something…?
“If this minister withdraws suddenly, it will surely alert the crown prince of Qin and may cause complications.” Ming Zhang had already returned to normal. “Your Majesty need not worry about this minister.”
“Ming Zhang.” Li Xuanming slowly turned around, his eyes sharp as if they could see through everything, his tone earnest and heavy with meaning. “I trust you, as always.”
When Ming Zhang emerged from the hall, it was only when the bright sunlight fell upon his shoulders that he suddenly realized he had been holding his breath ever since he took his leave.
Only then did he recall that he had meant to ask why the Emperor had not seen him these past few days but had forgotten. Ming Zhang let out a long breath of pent-up frustration, lowered his head, and smiled at himself in self-mockery. It had been a long time since he had been this tense.
“Lord Ming!”
Ming Zhang stopped and turned around, seeing Yan Yihuan hurrying over. “Are you leaving the palace?”
When he nodded, Yan Yihuan quickly added, “The flowers in the imperial garden are in full bloom right now. Shall I escort you and take a look along the way?”
It was obvious he had something he wanted to say. The excuse he used was clumsy, yet it left Ming Zhang with no way to refuse. “Alright. Every time I enter the palace, I come and go in a hurry. It really has been a long time since I last visited the imperial garden.”
There were not many masters in the palace to begin with, and the servants had neither the leisure nor the refined interest to admire flowers, so the imperial garden was quite quiet. The two of them arrived at the pavilion in the middle of the lake. The area was open on all sides, and anyone passing by could be seen at a glance, making it a suitable place for conversation.
“Ming Zhang-ge, you let me stay at your residence for several days before, and I never had the chance to thank you.” Although the flowers in the imperial garden were indeed competing in beauty, Yan Yihuan had no mind to admire them. “After returning to the palace, I thought it through. What happened to Brother Xu could not have been done by the Emperor. It was my fault for losing my head at the time.”
“Hm? Could it be that the Court of Judicial Review has already found something?” Ming Zhang stopped in his tracks. Xu Xinyao’s case was of no importance to him, and he had not paid it any further attention.
Yan Yihuan shook his head. “No. I just feel that the Emperor had no need and would not deceive me to avoid responsibility.”
“The Emperor says it wasn’t him. It’s rather rare that you believe it just like that.” Ming Zhang chuckled. “Though I suppose that is also what makes you endearing.”
“Does Ming Zhang-ge not trust the Emperor?” Yan Yihuan lifted his head to look at him, his expression unusually serious and earnest. “I have kept your suspicion in mind this whole time, and whenever I think of it, I feel a bit uncomfortable.”
“After all, you and the Emperor have shared many years of a bond, even closer than confidants. You shouldn’t let this create a rift.”
“A rift?” Ming Zhang was taken aback, then could not help but laugh. “So you have been worrying that I do not trust the Emperor, and that is why you went out of your way to talk to me?”
Yan Yihuan hurriedly nodded. Mingzhang had voiced his suspicion of the Emperor, and the Emperor had refused to see Mingzhang twice. He had been uneasy the whole time. These were both people he cared about, and if something like Xu Xinyao’s matter created a knot between them, how was he supposed to handle it?
“I have been worried for so long, afraid you might misunderstand each other.”
Ming Zhang let out a deep sigh and could not help reaching out his hand. Seeing the fingers coming toward his cheek, Yan Yihuan resisted the urge to dodge backward and let him pinch it.
“I really do not know whether you are clever or foolish.”
The author has something to say:
As I kept writing, I realized that this life’s little Yan Yihuan happens to be the opposite of Ye Shiyu from the previous life[mfn]Reminder: Previous life here refers to the author’s other book, 应不识, mentioned in the author’s note in Chapter 71.[/mfn].
Ye Shiyu was clever; Yan Yihuan is a bit slow.
Ye Shiyu was deeply affectionate; Yan Yihuan does not understand love.
Ye Shiyu was a eunuch; Yan Yihuan has strong desires.
In the previous life, he bore too much on his mind, so in this life it is all being made up for.
But what can you do when your husband is always destined to be an emperor? There are far too many people scheming over him.
