After listening to Song Zhiqing’s confession, Ye Yuhuan was more ashamed than shocked.
I’m such a terrible doctor.
Even though I entered Song Zhiqing’s inner world so closely, I was still foolish enough to see all of ‘Ye Yuhuan’s’ abnormalities as just the psychological trauma of losing her mother at a young age.
As expected, I’m just not professional enough. If I had been professional enough, if I hadn’t thought about those things like love, then I might have discovered the secret of Song Zhiqing’s suicide attempt. And at the very least, I wouldn’t have caused her a second trauma. Song Zhiqing’s past five years, those five years of living as if dead, should not have been like that.
“I’m sorry…”
Before she could finish, Ye Yuhuan turned her head away to hide the tears that wouldn’t stop falling.
Song Zhiqing left her seat and went to embrace Ye Yuhuan.
“There’s nothing to be sorry about. You saved my life. Don’t think I don’t know, entering the virtual world with a vegetative patient like me is very risky. If I didn’t wake up, you wouldn’t have woken up either.”
“Huanhuan—can I call you that? We’ve come this far, let’s not make things difficult anymore, okay?”
Ye Yuhuan looked up, her eyes blurry with tears. “But if I had been more professional, if we hadn’t fallen in love, you wouldn’t have lived like this for the past five years.”
Song Zhiqing laughed in exasperation. “Now you’re the one being unprofessional. If it wasn’t for falling in love with you, how could I possibly have woken up? I have no parents, my relatives are terrible, and I have few friends. If it weren’t for you, how would I have woken up?”
“But…”
Ye Yuhuan wanted to say more, but Song Zhiqing muttered softly, “So annoying.”
Then she lowered her head and kissed the mouth that wouldn’t stop babbling.
The world fell silent.
Well, not completely silent.
The sound of water echoed intimately and faintly in the garden. Fortunately, there was no one here, nor any animals.
And bees and butterflies cannot hear.
After a long time, Ye Yuhuan didn’t know how long, the person who had been relentlessly plundering her mouth finally pulled back, leaning on her shoulder and panting softly.
Ye Yuhuan opened her misty eyes. The watery sheen covering them now had no trace of sadness. She remembered the words she had faintly heard before the kiss and said with a strange sense of grievance, “You said I was annoying.”
Song Zhiqing’s head was still resting lightly on Ye Yuhuan’s shoulder, her hot breath sweeping over that bare, smooth skin. So close, she thought. So she effortlessly kissed it, then said in that shyly satisfied tone, “Who asked you to keep talking about a question I’ve already answered.”
“And you weren’t getting down to business.”
Business?
What business?
Ye Yuhuan recalled what had just happened, and a large blush suddenly spread across her face. She pulled off Song Zhiqing’s hand, which was still restlessly caressing her lower back, pushed her away, got off the table she was sitting on, and returned to her original seat.
Fortunately, no matter how eager Song Zhiqing had been, she had concentrated on the upper half. Ye Yuhuan’s sleeveless, deep-V long dress had precariously maintained its decency.
The table’s structure was stable and wide enough. The fruit tea pitcher and cups were far from the battlefield and hadn’t been knocked over. But after so much time, they had been completely cooled by the wind. Ye Yuhuan gulped down a large mouthful of tea, barely managing to suppress the lingering trembling in her mouth.
Ye Yuhuan suddenly asked seriously, “Why don’t you care that I and ‘Song Zhiqing’ are two completely different people?”
She thought, if Song Zhiqing was vague again this time, she would definitely get angry.
Song Zhiqing had also returned to her chair by now, one hand propping up her chin. The fatigue from their first meeting had mostly vanished. Her other hand reached across the table and grasped Ye Yuhuan’s, which was resting demurely on the tabletop.
“If you longed for a cake for a long, long time, and for a long, long time you couldn’t have it, you would, in the process of waiting, forget what fruit was on top of the cake, forget the frosting design, forget the shape of the cake. The only thing that would remain is the taste you would feel upon eating it, because that is the most profound connection you have with the cake.”
“You are my cake.”
“To be honest, of course I like the appearance of ‘Song Zhiqing’. I still remember in my memory that she—or rather, you—had a particularly cute dimple when she smiled. But what made me fall in love was not just the dimple. I love many things about you. What I love most is that you always steadfastly lead me towards the light. And this point is something that will not change, no matter the vessel. This is the taste of the cake that I have tasted.”
Ye Yuhuan understood.
She looked at Song Zhiqing and noticed that her eyes, which had been shrouded in gloom for five years, had now regained the gentle sentiment of “Ye Yuhuan,” as if irrigated from head to toe by a warm spring. In that moment, she set aside all the hesitation and insecurity that belonged to Ye Yuhuan. She opened her heart as frankly as “Song Zhiqing.”
“I’ve liked you for a long time.”
“A very long time, so long that you probably have no impression of it at all. I even confessed to you once. It was actually a very abrupt and hopeless confession. I could feel that you wouldn’t agree to it at all. I just wanted to let you know that I liked you. In my heart, you have always been, how should I put it, like the moon in the sky.”
“Beautiful and high above.”
“I never imagined I could win your favor, but I never gave up on trying to win your favor. In Greek mythology, the moon goddess Selene, in order to be with Endymion forever, did not hesitate to make him sleep forever. I also dreamed of being favored by a goddess, so I voluntarily fell asleep to find you in your dream.”
“I knew that as ‘Song Zhiqing’ was the time I was most likely to be loved by you, and as it turned out, you did fall in love with me. But this was even more cruel, because when the real me stood before you, you were blind to me just as before. I was even worried at the time that if one day you found out that I was ‘Song Zhiqing’, you might attempt suicide again.”
Hearing this, Song Zhiqing finally couldn’t help but interrupt Ye Yuhuan to defend herself. “I wouldn’t have! If you could have spent more time with me, if our relationship wasn’t doctor and patient, if you hadn’t acted so indifferent towards me…”
Song Zhiqing paused for a moment before continuing, “…If we didn’t have the illusion of ‘Song Zhiqing’ blocking the way between us, I would definitely have fallen in love with you.”
Ye Yuhuan smiled at her words, her beautiful face like a daffodil slowly blooming. An illusion. Yes, Song Zhiqing was not the only one with inner demons; she had them too.
“Then let’s test those ‘ifs’.”
“Let’s see if you will fall in love with me without those ‘ifs’.”
Ye Yuhuan could never refuse a trap baited with Song Zhiqing, just as in those long three years of high school, she had hidden behind a tree, peeking at the goddess she had placed on a pedestal.
But the goddess told her that she was actually a mortal.
And so she wanted to possess this mortal.
Song Zhiqing slowly stood up. Her face, as if carefully drawn by the creator, blossomed with a dazzling light like the dawn of the universe. That light could make one think of hopeful words like life and creation. Ye Yuhuan, bathed in this light, inexplicably felt a sense of danger. She pressed herself tightly against the back of the chair. The uneven shape of the wicker chair made her back ache, but this pain only deepened the premonition of danger.
Song Zhiqing walked towards her, step by step, neither fast nor slow. When she was close, she asked softly, “So now, you’re my girlfriend, right?”
Ye Yuhuan swallowed. She could guess that if she nodded, something might happen.
Song Zhiqing’s longing, suppressed for five years, had to go somewhere. Just now, she had been extremely desirous.
Well then—Ye Yuhuan nodded.
After all, she wanted to possess this mortal.
Song Zhiqing bent down and began to kiss her from her forehead. Her hands rested on the armrests on both sides, creating a circle with her body, enclosing Ye Yuhuan, enclosing her deeper, enclosing her in the desperate land of desire.
A sleeveless, deep-V long dress. Not only beautiful, but also easy to take off.
The moment she realized she was naked, Ye Yuhuan frantically covered her eyes. Song Zhiqing whispered in her ear to comfort her, “It’s okay, there’s no one here. The nearby houses are all mine, and there’s no one inside.”
But, it was daytime, after all.
And they weren’t indoors.
Ye Yuhuan couldn’t have imagined Song Zhiqing could be this eager. The sunlight covered her directly. She realized that everything about her would be presented in minute detail to Song Zhiqing’s eyes.
Before shyness, what Ye Yuhuan felt first was panic.
My calves are too thick, my chest shape isn’t good enough, my toes are too long and not elegant at all… Too many flaws, which could be summed up in one sentence: her body was not as perfect as ‘Song Zhiqing’s’.
But Song Zhiqing didn’t seem to notice these things. She continued to explore with great interest, her beautiful body lying on top of her like an ivory sculpture. Sweat flowed from her forehead, past her collarbone, gathered there, and dripped onto Ye Yuhuan’s body.
There was not a single sign of disappointment. It seemed Song Zhiqing had really forgotten most of it, as she had said, leaving only a deep feeling.
Ye Yuhuan gradually relaxed.
Of course, Song Zhiqing couldn’t be disappointed. There was nothing more pleasantly surprising than this.
All the secrets, all the mysteries of this body were exactly the same as the one she had once been familiar with. Even the muscles that trembled in passion were in the same place. Ye Yuhuan was so insistent on separating herself from “Song Zhiqing,” but in Song Zhiqing’s eyes, Ye Yuhuan was “Song Zhiqing.” There was no difference.
Just as now, the force with which Ye Yuhuan squeezed her shoulders was also no different.
On a clear spring morning, in her family’s garden, Song Zhiqing was intoxicated by another, more beautiful garden, lingering with great reluctance. It wasn’t until the sun began to beat down that they returned to a cool room. Of course, they also brought the garden back with them.
And in the distant Ye family home, two middle-aged people, eagerly awaiting their daughter’s return, waited from morning until dusk, from dusk until dark.
At ten o’clock at night, Ye Chu hung up the tenth call to Ye Yuhuan.
No one answered.
Was eating your Song Zhiqing’s breakfast so demanding of his daughter?
Ye Chu really wanted to curse right now.
But he didn’t dare. He knew that if he made a sound now, he would definitely attract his wife’s attention and then become her target. You see, Si Zhen hadn’t said a word for two hours.
Another half hour passed.
Ye Chu couldn’t take it anymore. He was old, and he was tired.
“How about… we go to sleep?”
Ye Chu thought Si Zhen would definitely fire at him like an Italian cannon, but she just gave a faint reply and then got up to wash.
Ye Chu scratched his head, puzzled. “You’re not angry?”
Si Zhen paused her steps and said calmly, “I am angry, but I’m over it.”
“And then I thought of something.”
“Our daughter is already 32 years old and has never been in a relationship.”
“So whether it’s Song Zhiqing or Song Zhi-whatever, if she’s willing to date, just let her date.”
Ye Chu was not happy to hear this. “What’s wrong with being 32? What era is this? 32 is the best age. How has our Huanhuan fallen to the point where she should just be grateful to be in any relationship at all!”
Si Zhen gave a hehe laugh.
Ye Chu shut his mouth.
The Italian cannon he had been dreaming of had finally fired at him tonight.
