07
Like, according to Baidu Baike’s definition, is: to have a good impression of or interest in a person or thing.
Yan Qi liked dancing, singing, learning new things, listening to economics lectures, the laws of the universe, and bustling crowds. She liked all the fans who liked her, the cozy, leisurely atmosphere of small towns, and the prosperity and tackiness of big cities.
All of these things were abstract yet real, unlike the ethereal nature of feelings.
She had never liked a person before.
A specific, real person who would tell her they liked and loved her, give her kisses and caresses, and in all her moments of helplessness-if she ever had any-promise to always be by her side.
So when Zhou Shichen smiled and told her she liked her, she was completely dumbfounded, more so than in an incomprehensible economics lecture. Her mind felt like a tangled ball of yarn, constantly twisting and turning. Not only could she not find the end of the thread, but the more she tried to sort it out, the messier it became. Finally, just as it was about to explode, she blurted out, “Oh.”
Every statement deserves a response. As the Captain, it was her job not to let anyone’s words fall flat.
Including Zhou Shichen’s confession.
Even if she didn’t know how to respond, she had to acknowledge it first, to let Zhou Shichen know that she had heard and understood. As for how to handle it, that would require further thought.
Zhou Shichen knew her all too well. Although she knew Yan Qi wasn’t being dismissive, she couldn’t help but feel a surge of anger. She opened the door and said irritably, “Get out!”
She couldn’t leave.
Yan Qi’s rational mind told her that the host had ordered her to leave, and anyone with a bit of politeness and tact should go. But the irrational little person inside her insisted that she had finally managed to get Zhou Shichen to open the door, and leaving now would waste all her efforts.
“So you’re just going to stay, huh?” Zhou Shichen grabbed her wrist and started pulling her outside. “Hurry up and go back. We have to get up early to record the show tomorrow. I don’t have time to-“
Before she could finish, the door was slammed shut with a bang.
Zhou Shichen was stunned for a moment, then became annoyed. “Yan Qi?!”
Leaning against the door, Yan Qi stared at Zhou Shichen with utter seriousness. “If I leave now, when will be the next time I can talk to you?”
Zhou Shichen was ruthless. “When we’re shooting group material and I have to act lovey-dovey with you for the fans.”
Yan Qi pursed her lips. “No.”
She said, “I want to talk to you now.”
Zhou Shichen was at her wit’s end. She crossed her arms and said, “Fine, what do you want to say? Go ahead. You’re rejecting me, right? No problem. If we can’t be lovers, we don’t have to be friends with benefits either. We’ll just be ordinary teammates.”
Yan Qi lowered her eyes. “Does that mean I can’t kiss you anymore?”
Zhou Shichen said, “Of course! What kind of ordinary teammates kiss? From now on, you can’t even touch me!”
Yan Qi said “Oh” again.
Zhou Shichen: “…”
She suspected that if this were a chat window, Yan Qi would probably send a [Smile] emoji to express goodwill, which, despite looking like an insult, was just a simple smiling face to someone with an internet speed as slow as Yan Qi’s.
“So, is there anything else you want to say to me?” Zhou Shichen asked.
Yan Qi thought for a moment and asked, “Can we not stand by the door? I’d like to sit down and have a proper chat with you.”
Zhou Shichen smirked. “Why don’t you take a shower while you’re at it?”
Yan Qi said, “That works too.”
Zhou Shichen: “…”
It wasn’t until Yan Qi had entered the bathroom with a disposable set of underwear and a bathrobe and the sound of running water started that Zhou Shichen let out a silent wail and collapsed onto the bed, belatedly realizing with regret-
She had fallen into the trap of that love-scammer, Yan Qi, again!
08
Yan Qi wasn’t a scammer, and Zhou Shichen knew this better than anyone.
Although they had first ended up in bed because of the “toy incident,” the ever-curious Captain had seemed to open a new door, exploring her body with a spirit of scientific inquiry, not deception.
As for how it evolved from a one-sided exploration to a mutual “great harmony of life,” she was the one who had proposed it.
…It was all Yan Qi’s fault for being so intensely and overwhelmingly aroused yet remaining composed enough to continue servicing her. Kissed until she was breathless, she had groped all over Yan Qi’s body without being stopped, so she had naturally assumed that Yan Qi needed her too.
And Yan Qi indeed hadn’t rejected her.
But Yan Qi had remained calm. Even when pinned beneath her, passionately kissing her, her beautiful eyes were still clear and serene, which gave rise to the absurd notion-to see what could make her lose control.
Later, she had certainly tried. She applied all sorts of knowledge and techniques she found online to Yan Qi. Yan Qi went from initial curiosity to enjoyment, and finally, to sinking into carnal desire. She sank completely, but she pulled away just as quickly. Even the post-coital cuddling was a formulaic, required procedure.
Yan Qi always belonged to herself; she never once lost control.
The more Zhou Shichen wanted to see her lose control, the more she invested herself, and the more she invested, the more her emotions were manipulated. By the time she realized it, Zhou Shichen understood that she had already fallen for Yan Qi.
Why would she fall for someone?
Zhou Shichen rolled over, staring at the chandelier on the ceiling, watching the light seem to approach and recede. Finally, she closed her eyes, thinking to herself that she loved shipping CPs, feeling happy and sad for others’ love stories, and getting emotional over imagined relationships. She thought she didn’t need love, that she wouldn’t fall for anyone.
But she just liked Yan Qi. She liked kissing Yan Qi, liked doing things with Yan Qi that lovers do, liked stealing away with Yan Qi for an absurd dream amidst their busy schedules. She liked the way Yan Qi looked at her-in the eyes of CP fans, they called it “love.”
But Yan Qi didn’t love her.
Yan Qi was like a robot with all her programs preset, always acting within her own established rules, manufactured without the “love” setting.
Unless she wanted to learn.
Zhou Shichen heard the water in the bathroom stop.
After waiting a moment, she stood up and started walking toward the bathroom, shedding her clothes as she went. Just as she opened the door, she saw Yan Qi applying body lotion. Yan Qi looked slightly startled. “Are you-“
“I don’t want to. I don’t want to talk or communicate with you right now.” Zhou Shichen kicked off her last piece of clothing. The bathroom light cast a moonlight-like glow on her body. She said, “I want you.”
Her tone was firm, leaving no room for argument. “Yan Qi, I want you.”
09
Yan Qi felt that she and Zhou Shichen could never be just ordinary teammates.
She thought this as the warm water cascaded over her body. She thought this when Zhou Shichen pushed open the bathroom door. She thought this as she pressed Zhou Shichen against the bathroom counter and kissed her.
If rationality was a thread in the face of desire, easily melted by fire, then she always retained a few threads of clarity, coolly observing her own descent. She would explain it away with objective reasons, and the reasons were different each time. Sometimes it was a physiological need, sometimes a psychological one, and sometimes… she just wanted to kiss Zhou Shichen.
Kissing was something that only happened between lovers, but she just wanted to do it. And when the kisses went too far, she would take full responsibility, putting out the fire for Zhou Shichen, and then they would tacitly forget about the sudden kiss.
So, was this actually “like”?
The shower was turned on again, and hot water poured down, running over smooth shoulders to the floor, swirling and scrambling to escape, like a spring rain melting the snow. Yan Qi felt alternately hot and cold, though mostly hot, since Zhou Shichen was in her arms, her fiery breath on her face. She turned her head and captured Zhou Shichen’s lips.
In the final second before her rationality snapped, Yan Qi heard Zhou Shichen start to cry softly. She swallowed her tears, and a bitter taste seeped into her beating heart.
Perhaps, she thought, the subsequent descent had nothing to do with physiological or psychological needs. It was only about Zhou Shichen.
Her need was Zhou Shichen.
Was it because she liked Zhou Shichen…?
10
They were up very late that night.
But having been in the industry for a long time, their professionalism was solid. Their performance on the mentor’s stage for the initial evaluations was still perfect, drawing screams and admiration from the trainees.
Especially after Yan Qi demonstrated the theme song’s dance and vocals, the trainees had already converted from casual observers to devoted fans. At the production team’s prompting, a few bold ones even started chanting for Yan Qi and Zhou Shichen to have a battle.
Zhou Shichen: “…”
She was here to ship CPs, not to be shipped.
But it was part of the show’s script, and she and Yan Qi were teammates and partners, so she had to do it whether she liked it or not. Fortunately, they had collaborated often and had excellent chemistry; even a freestyle performance was enough to ignite the entire venue.
Forced to perform for the fans, Zhou Shichen was full of resentment toward the production team. During the subsequent evaluations, she took it out by aggressively shipping several CPs she found pleasing to the eye. Only after getting her fill of creating drama did her mood improve.
By the time the initial evaluation recording ended, it was already past four in the morning. She slowly stood up, but her legs were so sore and weak that she couldn’t keep her balance. She swayed, and before anyone else could react, Yan Qi had already wrapped an arm around her. Yan Qi’s face was full of concern. “Are you okay?”
Zhou Shichen gritted her teeth. “…”
How dare the culprit ask her if she was okay?
She shook her head and said, “I think I’m just a little too tired.”
The vocal mentor next to them stretched. “Pulling an all-nighter for a recording would exhaust anyone. At my age, I don’t know how much rest I’ll need to get my energy back.”
The vocal mentor was a very talented and renowned female singer in the industry. Zhou Shichen, with her sweet words, quickly charmed her. By the time Yan Qi finished coordinating with the director, Zhou Shichen had already made plans with the mentor to get facials.
“Xiao Qi should come too,” the vocal mentor said. “I have a VIP membership at a place in H City. Their service and skills are top-notch. But you two are still young, full of collagen, so you probably don’t need it often.”
Yan Qi agreed. “Thank you, Teacher.”
Then she turned to Zhou Shichen. “I still have a few things about the trainees I want to discuss with you. Come over here for a second.”
Zhou Shichen hadn’t planned on speaking to Yan Qi, but since it involved work and she wasn’t a seventeen-year-old girl anymore, she naturally wouldn’t let her personal feelings interfere with her job. She excused herself from the vocal mentor and followed Yan Qi back to the dressing room.
As soon as they sat down, Yan Qi handed her a small booklet. “This is the list of trainees for each class level. See who you want to room with whom.”
Zhou Shichen was caught off guard. “Me?”
Yan Qi nodded. “Mhm.”
Zhou Shichen was completely bewildered.
Yan Qi explained, “Don’t you want to ship CPs? If you put the CPs you ship together, it’ll be easier to generate… material.”
Zhou Shichen: “…”
She meant to say “rumors,” didn’t she! She definitely meant rumors!
Zhou Shichen took the booklet, still full of suspicion. “Can I really do this?”
Yan Qi said, “There are no rules against it.”
Zhou Shichen asked, “And if there were rules?”
Yan Qi said, “There aren’t.”
Zhou Shichen let out a “tsk.” She opened the booklet to the A-class list and muttered as she read, “What do you think about Qian Ling and Liu Yijia? Their battle today is definitely going to be a major highlight of the first episode.”
Yan Qi said, “But they’re not from the same company. They probably don’t know each other, right?”
“That’s where you’re wrong,” Zhou Shichen lectured her. “It’s better that they don’t know each other. First meeting, mutual dislike, a battle to the death, but secretly they admire each other, and no one in the world is a better match. A top-tier duo, rivals turned lovers. What a great narrative!”
Yan Qi: “…Okay.”
“And let’s add Qiao Beibei. Same company and level as Qian Ling, teammates standing side by side, but she can’t compete with the newfound rival. A big love triangle, a chaotic battlefield. Perfect for shipping.”
Yan Qi gave her a thumbs-up.
Then she asked, “What about the fourth person?”
Zhou Shichen scanned the A-class list and finally pointed to a name. “Shen Xi’er.”
Yan Qi asked, “Why her?”
Zhou Shichen said, “You didn’t see the look in Shen Xi’er’s eyes when Qian Ling and Liu Yijia were battling. That familiar glint-she’s one of us shippers. Put her in there to ship the CP and create some drama. She’ll be the perfect fan club president, a really likable character.”
Yan Qi looked like she wanted to say something but hesitated.
Zhou Shichen asked, “What do you want to say?”
Yan Qi shook her head.
Zhou Shichen wouldn’t let her off the hook. “You clearly want to say something!”
Yan Qi paused for a moment, then said, “You’re very likable too, even without shipping CPs.”
Zhou Shichen recoiled in mock horror. “Have you been secretly surfing the internet? Where did you learn such a cheesy pickup line? You don’t actually think that would work on me, do you!”
Yan Qi blinked.
Zhou Shichen: “…”
A wave of deflation washed over her. Fine, she thought, it totally works on me.
“Don’t look at me like that.” Zhou Shichen avoided Yan Qi’s gaze. After arranging the A-class dorms, she flipped to the B-class list. “If you have something to do, you can go. I’ll give you the list when I’m done.”
Yan Qi did have other things to attend to, so she agreed with a hum and left.
Zhou Shichen stared at the closed door, feeling a sense of loss. She thought she was being ridiculous. She was the one who confessed first; she should be the one coddling and praising Yan Qi. Instead, she was taking advantage of Yan Qi’s good nature, knowing she wouldn’t get angry or cut off contact. She was being so willful, so spoiled.
Forget it.
Zhou Shichen wrote down the names on a blank sheet of paper, thinking, just a few more days of being willful. I can’t drag this on. This whole ‘decluttering’ thing might be cliché and dramatic, but it’s time to use it.
What’s the big deal about going back to being ordinary teammates?
It’s not like she couldn’t do it.
11
But Yan Qi thought her gesture of goodwill had been very obvious.
She even used a pickup line. It might have been cheesy, but people online said that as long as the person liked you, they would like any cheesy line you used. Girls were easy to please.
So why did Zhou Shichen still run away overnight?
She hadn’t even said goodbye; her assistant was the one who told her. She slowly removed her earrings, looking at her reflection in the makeup mirror. Seeing the confusion in her own eyes, she asked her assistant, “Why did she leave?”
“Who?” The assistant was heating milk for her and took a second to realize. “Oh, you mean Teacher Zhou? I think she had a last-minute emergency and had to go home. She’ll be back the day after tomorrow. After all, the dance mentor has classes to teach.”
As she spoke, the assistant sighed with admiration. “But no one works as hard as you. You have to teach dancing and singing, and also lead some small games. You should get a good rest tonight.”
“She went home?” Yan Qi clearly hadn’t paid close attention to her assistant’s words. She asked, “To S City or B City?”
“…Teacher Zhou?”
“Mhm.”
“She went back to B City.”
Zhou Shichen’s family was in B City. She came from a well-off family and was an only child, so she went home more often than the other members. When she was feeling willful, it wasn’t uncommon for her to cancel all her schedules, hide away at home, and cut off all communication, only paying attention to what she wanted.
Yan Qi nodded slowly. “When is my class?”
The assistant checked the schedule. “Tomorrow at eight in the evening.”
Yan Qi stood up and walked toward the closet. As she opened it, she said, “Book me a flight to B City for right now, the sooner the better. And book a return flight for tomorrow afternoon.”
The assistant said, “Okay!”
Although she had developed the habit of not asking why and assuming the boss’s decisions were always right, she couldn’t help but wonder. Teacher Zhou had just left for her home in B City, and Teacher Yan was following right behind her. Thinking about the atmosphere between the two of them today, the implications were terrifying-wife-chasing, this had to be a wife-chasing drama!
Despite her inner monologue, the assistant was efficient.
So, after Zhou Shichen got off the plane and was picked up by the car her family had sent, she scrolled through Weibo and saw airport photos of Yan Qi departing from H City. Underneath, a comment asked the fan site where she was going. The fan site replied: B City.
B City?!
Zhou Shichen stared at the passing scenery of B City outside the window, her brain completely short-circuiting. What is Yan Qi doing in B City?
12
Before the plane took off, Yan Qi kept in contact with Lin Yi, asking her about relationship problems.
Finally, Lin Yi had to get back to work, but not wanting to miss out on the drama, she simply created a small group chat for the three of them and added Xu Shuyan.
Xu Shuyan first sent a question mark, followed by a barrage of questions: “What’s this? Are you trying to exclude someone! I won’t allow it, we Seven Musical Notes are a family!”
Lin Yi: “The Captain likes Shichen.”
Lin Yi: “Now Shichen has confessed to her and run away.”
Lin Yi: “Teach her how to be in a relationship.”
Xu Shuyan: “???”
Xu Shuyan: “Wait a minute! I don’t get it. The Captain likes Shichen, so why did Shichen confess to the Captain?”
Xu Shuyan: “No way! Is there anyone straight left in our Gu Group?!”
Yan Qi: “Chopsticks are straight.”
Xu Shuyan: “…”
With the little time she had left, Yan Qi recounted the events between her and Zhou Shichen in chronological order, ignoring the string of shocked and stunned emojis Xu Shuyan was sending. Finally, she typed, “I’m boarding the plane now. I hope to see an effective plan when I land. Thank you.”
She added another sentence: “If this is successful, you will be handsomely rewarded.”
With that, she turned off her phone.
The plane taxied on the runway for a few moments before accelerating sharply and soaring into the vast sky. As it flew over clouds tinged red by the sunrise, she closed her eyes and had a dream.
In the dream, she was back on the day she first met Zhou Shichen. Zhou Shichen had warmly extended a hand to her. “Hello! I’m Zhou Shichen. You must be Yan Qi, right? Our future Captain? I’ve seen your file, wow, you’re amazing!”
She had shaken it politely, her own response formal and distant. “Hello. It’s nice to meet you.”
Zhou Shichen smiled at her. “It’s great to meet you too! We’re teammates from now on, let’s look out for each other!”
Later, their manager assigned them fan-service tasks. The two of them weren’t as rigidly paired as Lin Yi and Xu Shuyan. As the Captain, she had to care for everyone, and Zhou Shichen was the group’s little sun, shining on everyone.
But as Zhou Shichen’s main CP partner, she had diligently fulfilled her duties. She had to ensure that her gaze toward Zhou Shichen was the most special, her treatment of Zhou Shichen the most unique, and that Zhou Shichen was always her number one priority.
It was a formulaic fan-service tutorial, and she executed it perfectly.
Much, much later, on a certain intoxicating, dark night, they had just returned to the hotel from a celebration party. It was her scheduled time to listen to her economics lecture, but Zhou Shichen had pressed up against her from behind, nuzzling her like a lazy little kitten, breathing into her ear and calling out, “Captain, can we stop listening? I want you.”
Zhou Shichen rarely acted cute. Their relationship, from the very beginning, had maintained an extreme level of rationality, losing control only occasionally. After they got out of bed, they maintained the distance of ordinary teammates.
That was why she found Zhou Shichen’s cute act so novel. She began to study the level of happiness Zhou Shichen experienced after her needs were satisfied when she acted cute.
She never found out Zhou Shichen’s results.
She only knew that she herself had been very satisfied that night. It was a wonderful feeling of bliss. The Zhou Shichen she controlled, whose life or death was in her hands, she liked that feeling. She liked it when Zhou Shichen whimpered and collapsed into her arms to kiss her.
She liked Zhou Shichen, the little sun who, at that very moment, shone only for her.
13
Zhou Shichen had rarely felt so anxious.
But she had to admit, ever since she saw the photos of Yan Qi’s plane arriving, her heart had been pounding.
Surely Yan Qi hadn’t come all this way just to reject her in person? Anyone else wouldn’t be so earnest, but for someone with Yan Qi’s personality, the possibility was one hundred percent!
…Was she not even going to get the chance to make a clean, graceful exit?!
14
The first thing Yan Qi did after getting off the plane was turn on her phone.
The last message in the small group chat was from two hours ago. Xu Shuyan had replied to her: “You don’t need me to strategize for you. You two are in love. Just tell her you like her and want to be together.”
Yan Qi stared at the message for a while.
Yes, she thought, I like Zhou Shichen.
This feeling was like a mathematical formula. The derivation was bizarre and winding, but the answer was singular and certain, and it all pointed to Zhou Shichen.
She replied, “Okay.”
Xu Shuyan: “And with this, the Gu Group completes the ‘All Members in a Relationship Scandal’ achievement (5/5).”
System: This group has been disbanded.
15
Later, when Lin Yi interviewed Zhou Shichen about what she was feeling that morning when she opened the door for Yan Qi, Zhou Shichen replied that she was in a “smash the pot” mood, planning to drag Yan Qi into the bedroom, have one last go, and then say goodbye.
But of course, things didn’t go according to plan.
In the economics classes Yan Qi had taken, the professor had said on the very first day that economics teaches people that there are too many instances in this world where things don’t go according to plan. As she studied, she often felt regret over this fact.
Only this time, she felt grateful. She was grateful that she had knocked on Zhou Shichen’s door that morning, grateful for the sunlight that shone on her from inside, grateful that Zhou Shichen, before giving up entirely, had heard her confession.
She had said, “I like you.”
She had said, “I love you.”
She had said, “Zhou Shichen, be my girlfriend.”
She, who was always composed and unflappable, who rarely had moments of panic or haste, was so disheveled that day, breathless and leaning against the door, saying those words one by one, yet unable to be certain of Zhou Shichen’s answer.
And then, Zhou Shichen threw herself into her arms.
16
There aren’t that many certainties or foolproof plans in this world.
But when it came to Zhou Shichen, she could always be sure of victory.
17
#But of course, they still fucked later.
18
And would for a lifetime.
